"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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