I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
