But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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