fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Randomize
