so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
