is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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