sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Randomize
