Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I want a musical about memes.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
