Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
