trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
