He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize
