how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I wear drunk well.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
