9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
