Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
