yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
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