she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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