Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
my sisters under your porch take her home
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
