You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
