This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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