No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
