I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Who died my cat blue again?
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
