Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
