so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
