i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
