i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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