I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
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