everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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