I wannas sexs uuuuu
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Randomize