OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
