i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
