Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
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