Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
another moral hangover. fuck.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
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