I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
