did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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