found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
