I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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