yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
