I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
