whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
