Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
