My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I think my vagina is haunted
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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