in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
