my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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