I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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