Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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