Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Randomize
