Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Randomize
