why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
