Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
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