My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
